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The plural is gives. It’s like shelves or elves.

If you assume time travel is possible, and you assume that there is one time and place in the entire history of this universe that is the best day ever, you have to believe everyone is going to visit those space-time coordinates.

A wikipedia omniroll is a cylindrical food containing one layer of every item from the wikipedia article “list of rolled foods.”

Do you ever feel like we aren’t getting the future we were promised, but we are getting the one we were threatened with.

If aliens come, [laws] are the first thing we should hide.

One thing Garfield doesn’t get enough recognition for is truly bonkers, impressionistic color choices. This sidewalk is pink and yellow. Jon wears purple pants. Every panel is like an Easter basket.

Consistently zany. Sometimes.

source: HN

I’ve often complained that people think the most plentiful resource on the planet is your time. Not their time, your time. People are more than happy to spend your time on the strangest things. Take it from a guy who was once paid to scrape the breading off of the leftover fish filets at night, then re-bread the fish the next morning.

Nailed it: “There’s no I in team” says the guy saying someone needs to take one for the team.

It pains me to admit it, but this one even confuses me.

You’re asking me if something I didn’t see looks like something you’ve never seen.

It’s a simple yes or no question.

Also: red light cameras.

I would like to apologize.

Some caveats.

Probably because of something my ancestors did.

In which xkcd teaches us about cred stuffing.

You’re pointing to Waldo on a page

The Pepper’s Ghost illusion was originally used by charlatans to make people think they were looking at the dead, brought back as ghosts, which don’t exist. Now charlatans use the Pepper’s Ghost illusion to make people think they’re looking at the dead, brought back as 3D holographic projections, WHICH ALSO DON’T EXIST!

That’s Jenkins’ curse. He only deals with people who are, at that moment, dealing with Jenkins.

But what about the opportunity cost?

Civilized people love predicting the end of civilization as we know it.

I think it’s perfectly obvious that I am skulking!

I’m sorry that his lack of consideration made my actions necessary.