On the bonkers color palette of Garfield comics
One thing Garfield doesn’t get enough recognition for is truly bonkers, impressionistic color choices. This sidewalk is pink and yellow. Jon wears purple pants. Every panel is like an Easter basket.
Consistently zany. Sometimes.
How to Manage Your Time
I’ve often complained that people think the most plentiful resource on the planet is your time. Not their time, your time. People are more than happy to spend your time on the strangest things. Take it from a guy who was once paid to scrape the breading off of the leftover fish filets at night, then re-bread the fish the next morning.
How to Get Someone to Take One for the Team
Nailed it: “There’s no I in team” says the guy saying someone needs to take one for the team.
How to Explain What Words Mean
It pains me to admit it, but this one even confuses me.
How to Reassure Someone
You’re asking me if something I didn’t see looks like something you’ve never seen.
It’s a simple yes or no question.
Also: red light cameras.
I would like to apologize.
Probably because of something my ancestors did.
How Hacking Works
In which xkcd teaches us about cred stuffing.
You’re pointing to Waldo on a page
How to Share Your Knowledge
The Pepper’s Ghost illusion was originally used by charlatans to make people think they were looking at the dead, brought back as ghosts, which don’t exist. Now charlatans use the Pepper’s Ghost illusion to make people think they’re looking at the dead, brought back as 3D holographic projections, WHICH ALSO DON’T EXIST!
How to Understand Someone's Seemingly Irrational Behavior
That’s Jenkins’ curse. He only deals with people who are, at that moment, dealing with Jenkins.
But what about the opportunity cost?
How to Face the End of Civilization . . . Again
Civilized people love predicting the end of civilization as we know it.
How to Maintain a Low Profile
I think it’s perfectly obvious that I am skulking!
How to Accept Responsibility
I’m sorry that his lack of consideration made my actions necessary.
Size Venn Diagram
The large dipper and great potatoes.
How to Overlook Flaws
In case you’re wondering, no, the existence of Sybok has not been mentioned on Discovery. It’s almost as if they want us to forget Star Trek 5 happened.
Surely the best way to deal with awful people is to complain as loudly and publicly as possible.
The Literary Turing Test
To evaluate if a non-fiction book should have been a paragraph
Bitch or gun, which is worse?
Learning etymology is like going through the attic of a recently dead uncle, who seemed mostly domesticated, but who spent his life having x-rated adventures.